ELECTRONIC GADGETS NEED PARENT CONTROLS
Summertime and the usual nonsensical dilemma of who runs the household – the adults or the children – comes into question. While this is an ongoing episodic issue in far too many American households, it has escalated with school lock-down due to the Corona Virus.
Now, if we let them make the decisions – that is, let the kids run the household – they most likely will elect, first and foremost, to utilize their electronic gadgets 24/7 without a break for meals.
Mealtime was once seen as family time but we’ve allowed the kids to show up at the gathering with gadgets in hand and earphones in ears blocking out all family conversation.
Have Times Really Changed?
“It’s a new day,” I’ve been told.
“Kids aren’t like they used to be,” is a constant piece of feedback that comes my way.
“Geez, you’re so Old School” is my favorite of the critiques.
I’m old so, yes, I’m Old School, and while everyday is a “new day,” who should be in charge belongs in the hands of parents as it has been throughout the ages.
Kids aren’t any different. It is parents who’ve changed. Changed, in part, by letting the creative merchants dictate what should be happening in our household.
I know a teenager who doesn’t have a smartphone or even an old-time flip phone, so he doesn’t text or search out sites online. “Just who’s gonna pay that cell phone bill?” his cranky low-income mom asks.
Cranking out more of her philosophy she adds, “When he gets a job, then he can start shopping and buy whatever he wants.”
Middle-class Dad says his smartphone bill for the family of four runs about $600 a month. And, yes, the young adult offspring, as well as the parents, are pretty much constantly glued, with thumbs working, to their gadgets.
So what’s the problem?
There’s an ongoing concern regarding what those busy young thumbs are pulling up and viewing on that gadget.
There’s an ongoing concern regarding the impact on mental health for young people who are spending too much time gluing their eyes to the screen and absorbing content.
A recent mental health study on social-media addiction showed a definite correlation between its use and depression.
It’s further reported that people who checked social- media the most frequently were 2.7 times more likely to suffer from depression than their counterparts.
A REAL CASE SCENARIO 
Missie was depressed and actually talked suicide. She said her social media postings were not getting the same amount of “likes” as were other “friends” in her circle.”
She wept constantly because, she said, others in her circle were making bigger strides toward their life goals than she was.
The study captures her anxiety and depression as though the researchers were there with her in the EMR.
“Exposure to highly idealized representations of peers on social media elicits feelings of envy and the distorted belief that others lead happier, more successful lives.”
The psychiatrist in the EMR diagnosed Missie to be a social media addict. It has taken her a year, now, to move away from “the pull.”
Has she really conquered her addiction? Probably not, because her gadget still remains her best friend and her constant companion.
WHAT TO DO?
The cost parents pay for social media connections may far exceed the $600 Mr Middle-class Dad is shelling out monthly for his kids to engage in working their thumbs, deactivating their brains, and neglecting to engage in general conversation with the family.
The non-monetary cost parents are paying for social media connections is far more than the embarrassment low-income kids may suffer because their “cranky” moms haven’t provided them the gadgets their more affluent friends are hooked on.
For the parents who initiate the following easy-to-implement PARENT CONTROL suggestions, be prepared for your popularity rate to plummet.
- If you haven’t already – don’t buy your kids a smartphone.
- If they already have one, limit the amount of time it can be in use (while at home).
- Limit time on computers.
- Computers should not be in the bedroom but where they are visible to everyone (family room?).
- Become a role model – don’t always be on your gadget.
- Create activities that can include the kids – gardening/exercise/jumprope (ha, ha).
- No gadgets at the eating table.
- No television during mealtime.
- No gadgets in the car – get them to call out street names and landmarks. Get them talking.
- TVs and computers should be in the kitchen or open family area – not in the bedroom.
- Establish a time limit for all screen activities.
- One hour prior to bedtime NO screen activities.
This Post Has 4 Comments
Comments are closed.
> One might take for granted the suggestions that you have provided. The
> suggestions need to be posted in every home and classroom. I hope you
> continue to be a sound parent for ours and the next generation.
>
Thanks Ms Stephenson,
I will continue to offer sound parental advise and you make a good point – I oughta make a poster with these suggestions and get ’em on the market.
I too agree with your data rules, this will mean a very creative and fun Summer. Because not only will the children have to talk but so will Mom and Dad. As an old person I still remember those quiet chats with my parents, this is when I got to know them and them me. It was a good time. My brother and Sister and I could sit on a hot summer day and just talk. AS a adult we reflect on those times. What a gift and I think our children of today deserve this gift as well
Family communication, Ms Troy, is a ticket for a memorable life ride. With parents now, during the school closures and stay at home orders, having more time with their offspring, this is truly an opportunity to get to know each other as you have mentioned. Thanks much for your comment.