“I can’t do a thing with him, Ms Shirlee,”I was told by one of the mothers sitting in a front row seat at one of my parenting workshops.
She blurted out the rest of her dilemma. “Him and his Homies just be sittin’ around watching sports and playing video games all day.”
On the other side of the city, in another workshop with a very different clientele , I heard the same scenario but from an articulate young mother who spoke softly with a great amount of hesitation.
“I can’t get my 3-year-old to go to bed at night, which means he’s groggy and grumpy and then falls asleep in front of the television somewhere around midnight. I have trouble getting him up in the morning for pre-school and for me to get to work.”
Some folk like to say children are different these days.
I like to say children aren’t different but their parents and caregivers sure are.
I’m told my brand of parenting is “old-time.”
I like to answer, “Yes, I’m old.”
I hear, “Your children must hate you.”
I like to answer, “They’re Your Kids, Not Your Friends” which is the title of the book I authored.
Six rules for raising children who become productive adults:
Provide positive role modeling ,
Exhibit and teach responsibility through rules and chores
Create structure/organization – bedtime, mealtime, study time, play time,
Establish a philosophy based on values – money isn’t the guide line for family success
Command the ship but listen to the shipmates – I hear your story, but I’m the parent and I’m in charge
Sittin’ around all day? No structure, responsibility and I suspect no positive role- modeling
Falling asleep in front of the television? Where is the parental duty of establishing and maintaining structure?
- When life at home is chaotic; life in the workplace becomes more difficult.
- When home life becomes organized; the work day becomes more productive.
Find a list of Parent Development Workshop on our website Mothers Behind Bars Page. We provide workshop both in the prison and on the outside.