ONLY KIDS -THEY DON'T COME IN BULK
Published On 11-28-2009 , 11:00 PM
Here's some good news. The kid said he followed the advice of his parents and the other elders in his family. Jason, the kid, admitted it wasn't usually his choice; that's just the way things were in his family. It was do or die.
My grandmother said children were put here to listen to and obey the old folks and I actually, truly, believed that up until the time I moved from home, said the college freshman who I guess isn't really a kid anymore.
But what about the behavior of his high school buddies? Jason said he simply thought they were weird for doing their own thing. If only this young man's parents had been close by for me to give `em the third degree, but no such opportunity.
How did this only child defy the typical notion we have of who the spoiled brats are? And to top off this anomaly, Jason was a twin whose older brother died shortly after birth. He didn't even get special treatment because the family saw themselves as so lucky to at least have him.
What's a parent to do when there's only one kid to shower love on? When there's a bunch of them in a household, it's a lot easier to keep `em from being spoiled and to help them recognize life doesn't revolve around them.
What untruism. No such word? No such mantra, either. No question about it, life is different in a one-child household, but that doesn't mean Jason and maybe a few others have to be the oddballs.
My friend Audrey, a former local resident and a pediatrician, didn't have only one child, but the space between her children was about 15 years. She wasn't about to raise a spoiled brat. Make sure they have responsibilities and make sure they follow through on them - was this mother's hallmark.
Then there's the West L.A. mom I know who was so impressed with the genius of her only kid that the boy was never given any chores. Upon returning home after graduating cum laude from Harvard at the age of 18, mom was, among other things, washing, drying, folding and putting away his clothes.
He needs me, and always will," she proclaimed. There are the little ones who are allowed to be part of the mainstream family activities. They get to join the conversation with adult friends of the family - with relatives, too.
These little ones' opinion on all matters carries as much weight as those of their parents, and they've managed to master the art of smiling, winking, batting their eyes or whatever trick works to get mom or dad to do things their way. >While only children aren't the only ones guilty of getting away with such crap, their parents tend to let it slide, it seems to me, because it isn't happening in bulk.
Jason thinks only kids who are spoiled have spoiled it for those like him with parents who set out to raise kids who didn't fit the perception.
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