THE MIGHTY MURPHYS
Published On 08-23-2009 , 2:15 PM
MILLARD Murphy said his relative, who had come to manage the children and the home while his wife Molly was in the hospital giving birth to one more Murphy, packed up her bags and left the family ahead of the scheduled departure day.
Now, when you hear this story and don't know the Murphys, or when you hear this story and think of the typical house full of kids, you think the relative walked because she couldn't endure the pain and chaos.
But those who know Millard and Molly, the very proud parents of 11 children now grown, aren't surprised when Millard delivers the punch line: His relative simply said she wasn't staying, because the kids were so well organized she was just getting in the way.
The Mighty Murphys, as I like to refer to these amazing parents, recently celebrated their 63rd wedding anniversary with over 200 guests joining them at the Broadside Club House. This is how I come to be telling all their business
"No," was my answer to the smart lady from St. Andrews Catholic Church who was sitting next to me, "I don't do columns about affairs/events that I'm invited to. I kinda feel," I explained, "that is an invasion of privacy."
But if I don't shout about the Murphys, they sure aren't going to wave the flag and tell about what they've done because, for one thing, they don't really think they've done any more than what's required of parents.
But, if you've ever made the mistake of turning on your television and watching "Dr. Phil," you've gotten a pretty good dose of what parenting should not be, so I take great pride in putting Millard and Molly Murphy in the parenting spotlight.
"Let's see," I asked Molly, "don't you have a daughter who is an MD and another adult child who is a lawyer?"
"Uh, yes, but he's a law professor at UC Davis," she responded with a humble delivery that almost begged me not to continue highlighting the professional accomplishments of her many children.
How and what is the Murphy ticket for success?
Respect, organization, expectations, responsibility, broad cultural exposure and giving children direction and not asking them if they want it - seemed to be the Murphy plan.
Millard said expectations have to be high for each child as an individual, but each one must follow his separate passion. Respect for the family, Molly said, was key. The younger children had to follow the direction of the older ones, and the older ones were expected to accept this responsibility with a certain amount of honor and humility.
Mr. Wallace, who has known Millard since pre-kindergarten, told me once a neighbor paid him 10 cents for an errand. When his mother found out, "She put on her hat and marched me right back and made me return the money."
Wallace said his mother cautioned, "You may never accept money for that which you ought to be doing for a neighbor or friend."
Being a part of others' lives and successes was a neighborhood tradition both Molly and Millard lived by and set examples for.
Molly grew up in Boyle Heights. During World War II, when her Japanese friends were sent to internment camps, she corresponded with them. She has now given these valuable papers to the Japanese American Museum in Little Tokyo.
"Our children grew up with everyone welcome in our house," she said. Parents, said the Murphys, really need to broaden their children's cultural exposure.
Well, there's not space here to tell the full Murphy story. Tune in this Wednesday, August 26 at noon, on PCAC Charter Channel 56 or streaming here on our site homepage by clicking the channel 56 logo to meet these parents who really ought to be on national television replacing the constant parade of dysfunctional families with which we're continually inundated with. (note Wednesday show is a rebroadcast from last week)
This blog can be found in our column section where you can print a copy or e-mail to someone http://talkaboutparenting.org/pages/articles.php
|